I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
