Why are handjobs necessary in class?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
