So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
