no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm too high and old for this...
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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