I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
