she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Randomize
