Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
