I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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