that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
