last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
