About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
