she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
All the doctor said was why
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
