I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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