But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
