just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
