so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
