so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
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