I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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