but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
