All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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