There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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