Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Randomize
