Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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