so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
