so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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