I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
