sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Randomize
