were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
