...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
