why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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