The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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