Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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