I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
