Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
