Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
