Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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