found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I fill condoms, not promises.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
