think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Randomize
