Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
