I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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