Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
