I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
