We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize