So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
