I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
