escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
