Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize