Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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