I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
