using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
that's an acceptable place to lick
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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