when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
it was like eating out sand paper
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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